Michael Jackson Can Apparently Ruin Your Love Life.

Posted: July 30, 2009 in Ed-G Tales, Edgicated People
Tags: , , ,

Here’s an excerpt from Time Out New York’s sex column Get Naked by Jamie Bufalino. The guy mentioned here takes the award for most creative way to use Michael Jackson’s death for your own personal benefit.  It’s amazing.

Q: I am a 27-year-old female who recently broke up with her boyfriend of five months. We’ve known each other for two and a half years; we were friends for a long time and then recently started dating. I thought all was good until the death of Michael Jackson. When he died, I did not hear from my boyfriend for three days. We had made plans to meet my brother for brunch on that Saturday and he completely stood me up—no call, text or e-mail. He eventually texted me saying he’s upset by MJ’s death and just needs time alone. Then, after not speaking for another three days, he texted me to see if I was free after work. I said, “Yes, let’s talk later.” He never responded. I wrote him an e-mail the next day to end it, but I don’t know if he ever saw it. He also de-friended two of my friends on Facebook this weekend. What are your thoughts?

A: I have a supersensitive bullshit detector, and it’s going ape-shit right now. Give me a break. Who goes AWOL from their girlfriend for three whole days because of the sudden death of a celebrity? Sketchy people, that’s who! Who knows what your boyfriend was up to, but he certainly wasn’t on a truth-telling spree. Okay, listen up, everyone: Ten times out of ten, the “I was too busy or upset or drunk or depressed to take ten seconds to telecommunicate” excuse is bogus. Always has been and always will be, particularly as the ways to communicate become more and more varied and omnipresent. If I were you, I’d break up with him just for not coming up with a better excuse. You deserve something more intricate and detailed—perhaps something involving the Russian mafia, chloroform and being forced into sex slavery. Don’t break up by e-mail, though—that’s tacky. Have at least one more face-to-face and try to get to the bottom of his erratic behavior. If his excuses don’t get much more believable, cut him loose—pronto.

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Comments
  1. yogini says:

    outrageous

  2. Tracy says:

    why on earth would he tell her to break up in person? and obv the guy will have no good excuse….wtf. email was perf legit based on the sitch

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